December 2, 2014
Sometimes I get sucked into the drama of life, and it seems near impossible to rise above it. When this
happens beauty dissipates and despair hovers.
Tragedy struck our small town. Although it was not personal, pain attached itself to my heart with a
fierceness that threatened to extinguish me.
Why does a world of such beauty have such ugliness? Why do innocent people have to suffer? Why?
Like a lighthouse on a remote shore, I sent out my distressed beacon of pain. And what happened?
My heart turned into cheese and life became a cheese grater. The pain was no longer someone else’s. It
was my own, and it was escalating out of control. It hurt so bad that I became grumpy and unpleasant- a
stocking full of coal was definitely heading my way.
I didn’t mean to hurt others with my grumpiness. It’s just that I hurt so much.
I have had enough years to know what I had to do. I had to find beauty and when I found it, I had to
exaggerate it; thereby changing my lighthouse beacon from pain to joy. Easy? NO!
It was like frantically searching for beauty on rattling railroad tracks while hearing the deafening
whistle of an impending train. Changing momentum is so difficult.
I have found it easiest to start out small-
in the warmth of my tea,
in the color of a bird’s feathers,
in the beauty out my window,
in the poetry of a song,
in the comfort of friends,
in the smile of a child,
in the love that fills this home….and work my way to big-
until the momentum of joy is so great that even another
rejection letter feels like nothing.